The Roller Coaster

Two weeks ago in Beaver Stadium we said goodbye to our seniors including our favorite player and last weekend we watched him help his team win the last regular season game against Michigan State. These kinds of events always cause a bit of sadness, but they also give rise to a new hope for the future (one I’m sure the “82 Crew” will be looking forward to.)

On Friday before the Lions game with Indiana, I had lunch with my favorite player at the “Green Bowl” restaurant in State College. It was really nice for me to have this time with him to reflect on the past five years. He told me how he felt about his time at Penn State, which I will not discuss for this blog, and he helped me start to put my own feelings into perspective. For weeks, I had been anticipating how I would feel about my son’s last game in Beaver Stadium. Some of the other player’s moms had already been getting weepy thinking about it, but I was having a hard time “getting my head around” how I really felt. After lunch with my son, I have finally put together some of my thoughts.

This season, like the past four years, has been like riding a roller coaster up and then down, sometimes enjoying the ride but other times thinking it can’t end soon enough. In response to riding this roller coaster, I think I have developed a case of dissociative identity disorder (DID). The WebMD defines this as “a mental illness that involves the sufferer experiencing at least two clear identities or personality states, each of which has a fairly consistent way of viewing and relating to the world.”

I am pretty sure this describes me. One of my personalities writes this blog. She is the “logical one” who doesn’t say things her “alter ego” says. So even though “alter ego” already “got her head around” her true feelings and wrote about the end of her favorite players career at Penn State, she can’t publish it. However, if you would like a copy, she will mail you one. But probably, if you are an “82 Crew” member, you already know what “alter ego” had to say.

So you ask “How does the “logical one” feel?” She cried at the Indiana game. Not when the senior football players ran out onto the field, but when P.J. Maierhoffer twirled her baton for last time in Beaver Stadium. Maierhoffer has been wonderful to watch and someone both egos will miss seeing. Not that we won’t miss seeing our favorite player, but we hope to be seeing him at another venue.

The “logical one” thinks the roller coaster ride over the past five years provides many lessons for her favorite player. He has experienced highs like winning two Big Ten Titles and lows like the losses to Iowa, Ohio State and USC. He has learned what it is like to compete head to head with people sometimes winning the battle and other times not but never giving up. During the high points of the ride, the ‘fav’ gained valuable playing experience at ‘game speed’. The low points of the ride were mostly mental challenges. The ‘fav’ learned how to be patient and ready to go full speed when his number finally got called. He learned to be self- motivated and push himself to stay focused on the goals he set even when circumstances around him didn’t play out the way he had hoped. Yes, he probably learned more valuable lessons from the lows than the highs, but the time at the top of the rollercoaster was more fun.

So while my ‘alter ego’ has her own thoughts on this ride, the one that writes this blog thinks overall the Penn State experience for her ‘fav’ was a valuable one because the ride wasn’t easy and everything gained was earned not a gift. Hopefully, ‘the fav’ gets the opportunity to play at the next level (no roller coaster rides allowed) and in the mean time I’ll get the twins some therapy!

Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving! I will be in Germany next week, but when I return I will post more pictures from the season including all the things to see and do around State College. I will continue to write this blog about Penn State and my ‘fav player’ until after the bowl game then I will change its focus. See you after December 6th.